Wayfaring

Sometimes there just aren't enough words to fully capture one's thoughts. Like today, for example. I just wrote the next paragraph in an email to a friend. Sometimes 1st thoughts are the most accurate, so here's what I said:

Lisa asked last night if I'm worried about today's appt. I'm not worried so much, but on the other hand, today's appt. has dominated my thoughts for the last couple of weeks, including the couple of times I rolled over last night & woke up briefly. I'm not afraid particularly--my denial mechanism works pretty well!--but neither am I excited about it. But at the same time, I am anxious to know what he's going to say. (confused yet? me too!)

A couple of thoughts from greater minds come to my lesser mind this morning. First, David Jeremiah, speaking from Psalm 63:1: "The Lord of the desert is also the Lord of deliverance from it." Almost a throwaway line for him; a lifeline reminder for me.

Then this in the Of First Importance email just this morning. Forgive the length; Horatius Bonar was paying very, very good attention to what the Lord was saying when he captured this. (This is just an excerpt, btw).
“We have only the foretaste now. The full brightness is in reserve, and we know that all that is possible or conceivable of what is good and fair and blessed shall one day be real and visible. Out of all evil there comes the good; out of sin comes holiness; out of darkness, light; out of death, life eternal; out of weakness, strength; out of the fading, the blooming; out of rottenness and ruin, loveliness and majesty; out of the curse come the blessing, the incorruptible, the immortal, the glorious, the undefiled!
Our present portion, however, is but the pledge, not the inheritance. The inheritance is reserved for the appearing of the Lord. Here we see but through a glass darkly. It does not yet appear what we shall be. We are now but as wayfaring men, wandering in the lonely night, who see dimly upon the distant mountain peak the reflection of a sun that never rises here, but which shall never set in the ‘new heavens’ hereafter. And this is enough. It comforts and cheers us on our dark and rugged way. It would not be enough hereafter, but it is enough just now. This wilderness will do for us until we cross into Canaan. The tent will do until the eternal city comes. The joy of believing is enough until we enter on the joy of seeing. ”
Horatius Bonar, “Home”

Now, please note: I do not expect to hear today that "the time of my departure is at hand" just yet. My plan is to stick around for a while, for there are football games to watch, countries to visit, fish to catch, coffee to drink with friends, boats to enjoy, students to teach, articles to write (possibly even a book or 2...one never knows!), and especially loved ones to, well, love. There are many more June 2 anniversaries I'd like to celebrate (only 24 so far!); there are 3 college graduations I'd like to attend--2 undergrad ones, and one Pharm.D. one; there's one more high school graduation I plan on crying over next year; there's one more prom I need to fret over next Spring; there might even be a couple of weddings I plan to be part of in a few years--one as the weepy, embarrassing father of the groom, and one as the weepy, embarrassing father of the bride. There's a condo development on Lake Jordan in AL that I need to visit & walk around & act like I own & built the place (ok, it's my brother's...but I still plan on walking tall there one day soon as if I had anything at all to do with it). There are many more times I need to tread/sit on the beaches of NW FL & S AL...concerts I need to see...books to read...mission trips to take...foreign languages to learn (Russian & Polish are my current desires there; James & I just discussed learning other languages yesterday!)...yards to mow...at least one pastor I need to help hire on the pastor search committee...powerpoint slides to flip in worship services...I think you get the idea. And through it all, it's my strong hope that there are many people my Jesus would choose to impact through me.

So do not read in Bonar's quote any hint of resignation by either him or me. Rather, read the great hope that we have as believers. Hope that brightens our days...this day in particular for me. Quoting Tony Evans once again, when God shows up, any ol' bush (or oncologist's office!) will do.

Thanks doesn't even come close as this day begins, but thanks for holding us up before the throne.

With much love and great hope, and with great faith in the Lord of the desert & of deliverance from it,
Mike